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When I was a little kid, one particular auntie used to always tell me, “We need to buy you an etiquette book.” Being a naïve child, I asked, “What’s etiquette?” to which my aunt replied, “exactly my point.” In retrospect, I’m not sure how exactly I was expected to know all these mysterious rules of propriety that I was unknowingly breaking, especially since, as my aunt seemed to argue, nobody had given me this strange book she was always mentioning, but would never show me.

Remembering this piece of my childhood I wondered, what about etiquette in the workplace? A quick search on Google will produce many resources for business etiquette and manners, with tips for handshake protocols that say stuff like if a Japanese businessperson hands you their card, you are supposed to excuse yourself to go and laminate it immediately. This is good general stuff, but nowhere did I find explanations or pointers for how to work in a cross-functional, team-oriented development environment, the stuff that’s REALLY needed.

Having good product development etiquette is about more than shaking hands and attending meetings on time--it’s about practical work processes in collaborative environments that can save you time and help you make money. I don’t think an entire book is necessary, but here’s a short list of the areas of product development where etiquette guidelines may be needed:

1. Professional Respect in Cross Functional Communication

Do you have any good friends that used to be people you hated? The majority of problems between functions involved in product development are like those in any other interpersonal relationship, and typically stem from unfamiliarity with the other person and the natural tendency to not trust who you don’t know. This is why most organizational psychologists and team building coaches recommend social functions for co-workers outside of the workplace. While it can be awkward to try to be friends with people at work that you wouldn’t approach in the real world, friendship among colleagues should be encouraged when it happens naturally, and it doesn’t hurt to provide opportunities for it.

What oversteps bounds is when functions engage in clique-like behavior that creates an environment where people undermine each other at the expense of the project and the company. Disrespect between marketing and engineering is a classic cultural conflict that can resemble racism in its stereotyping and discrimination. These modes of thinking are wholly inappropriate and obsolete. My recommendation if you have toxic people that engage in such problem behavior is to terminate them right away, no matter what special skill or knowledge they have (“addition by subtraction”).

• For more on this subject, read “Cross-Functional Communication”

2. Responding in a Timely Manner

The nature of almost everyone’s work is to participate in a combined, collaborative effort. Very few people work on every aspect of a project from start to finish by themselves. Because of this, every person involved immediately becomes a potential constraint or point of delay for the overall system. When passing work back and forth or requesting information from others, by delaying response on things with little system-wide impact in favor of accelerating response on things with leverage, you can greatly speed the flow of a project simply by how you move information, but it takes all involved to accomplish. It also helps if people try to understand the whole system’s priorities, and don’t suffer from tunnel-vision on their piece of the pie only. 

• For more on this subject, read ”The Quick and the Dead”:

3. Building Quality Into Your Work

A new golden rule is needed today which states, “prepare work for others as you would like work prepared for you.” It’s funny, people will straighten up their -house for the cleaning service, but they won’t bother checking the accuracy of part numbers before they hand over the design specs to their colleague. A lot of defects and unnecessary rework could be avoided if more people just simply checked over their work for completeness and accuracy. Bigger opportunities exist for those who go the extra step of anticipating questions or problems and pre-solving them before they ever surface on the other person’s desk. This could be as simple as looking up a phone number or attaching a file to an email, but, added up, this measure can save time and reduce a lot of stress. One caveat: rather than following your example, sometimes this can make those around you even worse (“why should I, he’ll do it himself”).

• For more on this subject, read ”Zero Defect Product Development”

4. Make Email Useful Again

Economist and professional miser, Andrew Tobias, once said “a luxury, once sampled, soon becomes a necessity,” and this is exactly what’s happened to email (and cell phones). Email is out of control, and until we relinquish control to a government, it will likely stay that way. Still, it may be important to remind ourselves now and again about the proper way to use this tool. The website below does a good job with all the standard email etiquette guidelines. 

• Online Guide to Professional Email Etiquette

5 – Make Meetings Useful Again

Meetings are often places where work gets assigned while no work is getting accomplished. The fact is many people have days filled with them, which can put productivity seriously at risk. While the most important aspect of meeting etiquette is knowing when NOT to hold one, I’m sure there is room for improvement in most of the ones that will be scheduled anyway. Below is a link to a page of different resources concerned with properly conducting meetings, specifically, “How to Run a Good Meeting: A Guide for New Leaders.”

•  Collection of resources on running team meetings

Any reaction to this article? Send your feedback to gregg@roundtable.com

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